“Thank you for sharing.”

It is 4:30 PM Eastern Time in the USA. J is at work. We had lunch at Longhorn’s Steakhouse, a chain restaurant we both enjoy. The waitstaff is nice and the food is good enough. I went to WW, formerly Weight Watchers, weighed in and am progressing toward a goal weight of around 165 lbs, (around 75 Kg or 11 stone/11 lb.) I am making progress again.

The swimming is coming along swimmingly. I started to deviate from doing healthy things back February, 2018. A friendship ended. If a friendship ends, it isn’t a friendship, is it? I dealt with this emotional disruption by punishing myself. I ate any and everything that would not directly kill me. I stopped exercising to the point where my body had lost its strength, endurance and flexibility. I developed diabetes. As to the former friend, he could have cared less, I am sure. It took nearly nine months to get through this. One lives. One learns.

So I picked myself up, dusted myself off and started taking care of myself again. Hence the WW, the swimming, the renewed positive outlook. I am home alone, taking time to write. Mentally, I am sorting out Love vs Lust. The conundrum never seems to resolve itself. To love is a beautiful thing. To lust, to gratify the power and and conquest need, has that empty dissatisfaction where I am simply not connecting at an intimate level with another person. I was willing to settle for that for the longest time.